Music Bender

Being from Kentucky (for the time being), I’d heard of Cage The Elephants long before they made last night’s appearance on The Late Show with David Letterman. And I’m still not impressed!

Their song, Ain’t No Rest For The Wicked, is not only choppy, but the title’s even a misquote (the correct quote is “Ain’t no rest for the weary”. But we can overlook that, because it’s a common misquote)!

Beyond the music, lead singer Matt Shultz jumped around in a way that was more like a twelve year old pretending to be a rock star; if ya look at heroes like Steven Tyler and even early Mick Jagger, you’ll at least see synchronized histrionics (in time to the beat, and done to emphasize part of the song). The fact that the rest of the band were rather sedate didn’t add much; he stuck out like a sort thumb!

And then there was guitarist Lincoln Parish, who looked … well, like he had some kind of problem that kept him from straightening up. Now, I know any guitar that’s fashioned after a dobro is gonna be hard to play — but this guy looked like he was missing something …
But we’ll have to wait and see if, in the long run, they straighten those areas out …

UNKNOWN SONS OF DIFFERENT FATHERS

By now, the world’s heard about Michael Jackson’s allegedly long-lost son, Omer Bhatti (aka rapper O-Bee). It seems that more proof is coming in proving that he is the late King of Pop’s son.
Even Michael’s strange pop, Joe Jackson, said that O-Bee is the son of the Gloved One. The fact that he was sitting beside Jackson’s sister, Rebbie, at the memorial service only added fuel to the fire!
Personally, I don’t see any problem with this.

But what I do see as a problem is the familial rejection of young Christopher Cyrus.
Here’s a guy who actually wants the approval of his famous dad, Billy Ray and half-sister Miley, but doesn’t get it (he was the product of an affair his father had in S.C. in 1991).
Personally, I think it’s time for Billy Ray to put away any animosity, ‘fess up and accept this youngster into his family. Anybody out there … can I get an amen??

Whaddya think about this idea, yardbirds?

SongVest has partnered with writer Preston Glass to offer bidders 25% of his writer’s share for his hit songs “We Don’t Have To Take Our Clothes Off” and “Miss You Like Crazy”.

In addition to sharing in the royalties, the highest bidders will also receive one-of-a-kind platinum album awards plaques featuring handwritten and signed lyrics.

Glass says, “As a songwriter, sharing my songs with people is always a great thrill. But I can think of no deeper fan connection than sharing the benefits of ownership as well. It’s a mutually rewarding opportunity,”

Over the past three years, SongVest has offered music fans, collectors, and investors the unique opportunity to share the royalties with the writers of their favorite music.
Past auctions have included the rights to songs recorded by Aerosmith, Bon Jovi, Carrie Underwood, Ringo Starr, Ozzy Osbourne, and The Monkees.

The auction will begin at 3PM EST on Saturday, August 15 and end at 3PM EST on Saturday, August 22. Fans can register now at http://www.songvest.com to learn more about the revenue history for each song and get a glimpse behind the scenes at how and why the songs were written.

The Grammy Foundation and MusiCares are asking teen fans to take part in a new charity auction that can benefit their high school music programs.

You can bid on items like: original artwork and photos from Taylor Swift and Paris Hilton, signed postcards from Kanye West and Stevie Wonder, and actual guitars signed by Depeche Mode, John Mayer, Tom Petty and Sheryl Crow.

The GRAMMY Foundation makes it possible to show others how our culture is impacted by music, and does it through music education programs, scholarships and grants. MusiCares, on the other hand, provides a safety net of critical financial assistance and services for music people in times of need.

You’ll also have the opportunity to pick up hoodies signed by the Jonas Brothers, a T shirt signed by Iggy Pop, and items from Coldplay, Maroon 5, Joe Satriani, the Dave Matthews Band, Slash, Alice Cooper, Jennifer Lopez, Jennifer Hudson, Neil Diamond, 3 Doors Down, John Legend, Jason Mraz, U2, Melissa Etheridge, Green Day and many more.

The auction runs until July 31 and can be accessed here.

Y’know, it’s great to read something positive about rock music — especially when the “harder” bands are gettin’ such a “bum’s rush” in the mainstream media. For example:

A young rock fan in England had his dream come true when he met the legendary rockers, AC/DC, thanks to the UK Make-A-Wish Foundation.

Six-year-old Hendrix of Walsall, West Midlands, has Acute Monocytic Leukemia and has been a BIG fan of the famous rockers since the age of three, when he had to have a major bone marrow transplant. Believe it or not, AC/DC’s music was the only thing that would calm him and help him sleep!

As well as watching the band’s show in Wembley (from a VIP box, no less), the youngster was escorted backstage where band members Brian Johnson, Angus Young, Malcolm Young, Phill Rudd and Cliff Williams gave him a goodie bag and his very own miniature guitar, signed by all the band members!

“Tonight has been fantastic for Hendrix and just to see him so happy means everything,” his father said. “He has met his heroes and this will be something he will never forget. Thank you so much for making his wish come true.”

You’ll find many in our field who are busy with charitable or benevolent causes today — namely, because, as a genre, we know the benefits will only help the human condition — one that we, not so long ago (think Sixties here) had such a hard time with.

So kudos to Brian, Mal and the band for their kind work. Having lost a young friend years ago to the disease, I can guarantee that what they did for this lad helped him more than a hundred doctor visits!

THERE’S NO PLACE LIKE …

Obviously, the last word is “Home”.  Wherever we go in this world — whether on business trips, college, military service or simple vacations — we always look forward to getting back to the comfort and safety of home.
But what happens if your home is hit by some kind of disaster?  Is it insured in the event of a loss?  So many homeowners put insurance on a “back-burner” because they think it’s too expensive. 
Of course, it’ll cost you a lot more should anything happen to your residence.  But, to help you find the best home insurance quote, all you have to do is click the link you just passed. These folks will help you find multiple quotes — and do it fast, so you can save time and money. They’ll even give you tips on how much coverage you’ll need.
Protect the investment that’s called “home”, and click there now, okay??
It’s the smart thing to do!

Y’know, whenever rock music’s discussed — whether here or elsewhere — there’s something missing from the conversation; something interesting.

Have you noticed that, among all genres of music, ours has the fittest, trimmest stars?  Yeah, country music’s in the mix, too, but, by and large, rock performers have better builds and, overall (if they stay away from the booze and bongs), better health.

Now, there’s a reason for this. 

You see, the rigors of rehearsals, tours (often from setting up equipment to the actual performances themselves) and the adrenalin that’s pumping throughout all that can be excruciating to any singer or instrumentalist who’s out-of-shape.
They also have to concern themselves with the public image.  Let’s face it:  in today’s world, “fat” just doesn’t sell (unless you’re a comic actor).

So, beyond the music, the glitz and glamor that comes with the territory, we’ve gotta take a moment and appreciate their fitness — and maybe even take a few lessons from them!

DIETING MADE EASIER

Of course, we all want trimmer, healthier bodies … and, when that calls for dietary supplements, we want to make sure they work to their full potential!
But there are so many of them out there, how can we be sure we’re getting the best?

Obviously, we can “pick and choose” through whatever pills and potions the local department store or pharmacy has, but, to find an actual diet pill that works, all you need to do is click that link you just passed.
These folks compare the best diet pills on the market and rate them by criteria that mean something to the consumer: Power, ingredient quality, reputation, results, value … even possible side effects! (Now, how many will go so far as to check that out for you?)
If you want to know which pills scored the highest (ie, the best), then just click the link you saw up there …
and, with their findings, you can discover the best diet supplement to help bring out the new you!

Y’know,  a rock musician’s life isn’t filled with only the best in life.  Drug and alcohol abuse has taken quite a few of them from us, often at an early age.

Michael Dick was born in Spokane, Washington (I don’t believe he was any relation to Paul Revere [rn: Revere Dick] who was from the same area).  His father was an artist and his mom, a musician.

In 1963 he met Chris Hillman, Gene Clark, David Crosby and Roger McGuinn, and changed his name to Michael Clarke when they formed The Byrds. The rest, as you know, is history.

Other than the band that put his face and name on the map of rock music, Mike was also part of the Flying Burrito Brothers and founding member of Firefall (who hit the chart twice with You Are The Woman and Just Remember I Love You). 
An accomplished artist as well, Michael died from cirrhosis of the liver at the age of 47 as the result of an addiction to alcohol, which started at the age of 14.

It was his dying wish to go on national television so that all the children across the nation could see what happens to you when you start abusing alcohol in your teens.
He said, “I want to tell them to say no to alcohol, it’s the most deadly drug of all! I want to tell them to get high on life through music and art.”

Although he looked forward to making this PSA, he never got the chance (the photo on your right was taken just an hour before he died). 
But he did leave an amazingly-heartwrenching letter … one that all teens … in fact, everyone, rockers included … that I wantcha to read.
Now, it’s a bit long to put in here, so do yourself a tremendous favor and download it here … or, to see it online, go here (the hard-copy is easier to share offline, though).
Maybe it’ll wake somebody up …

First, a quick request: One of Liverpool’s music legends, Billy Ruffley (”Faron” of “Faron’s Flamingos”) is due to go into surgery tomorrow at 11 AM (GMT, 6 AM EST) to repair his leg. However, due to an extremely weak heart, his doctor has told him he may not make it off the operating table alive.
So please say a quick prayer for the Mersey’s legendary “panda prince of prance” and his recovery, okay? Thanks …

Whitney Houston appeared at the world premiere of her new album, “I Look to You” (Arista), in London last week, and, according so some who attended, the lady’s lookin’ goood!

She came onstage for a few moments after Sony’s legend Clive Davis played nine tracks from the album (it’s due to be released Sept. 1 in the U.S. In England, it’ll be out a day earlier by RCA).

But Davis is quick to say the album is “by no means done,” while many of the songs played were still not completely finished.

Houston thanked Davis for his work on the album, though, saying: “When Clive called me I was pretty ready to buy my island home [and retire] but he said, ‘No, you’re going to sing again, people want to hear you.’”

Calling the album “a labor of love”, she said: “I hope that these songs stay with you for a lifetime.”

WEIGHING IN

There are many of you who’ve tried to lose weight by using the diet supplement, nuphedra, but haven’t been able to find it at your local nutrition stores lately.
It’s because the FDA has ordered a reformulation of the supplement so that it’s compliant with their Good Manufacturing Practices Policies.
Now, that might leave a few people confused about the future of this successful dietary aid.  But there is a new version that’s already undergoing testing and is expected to be released in September of this year.
In the meantime, if you want to read more about ephedra, just click the link you just passed. You’ll find a site that’ll not only give you the full report but will also help you find alternatives until the new formula’s released to the public! It’s straightforward — giving you the positive effects while reminding you of the importance of taking it only as directed.
But you can’t wait for the new version, they’ll even help you find it on eBay!

With all the benefits that you can gain, you’ll certainly want the new, reformulated its reformulation is complete when it comes on the market. So click on the link and find out more about the supplement — and the latest updates!

First, I’ve gotta share this with ya:

Now, you’ve heard … er, read … me talk about the fab new UK band, The Fore, and many of you have become great fans of the foresome.
Well, they’ve now been nominated IRM Best Independent Artist of 2009! And all it takes to get them on top is your vote for them to win!
Here’s how ya do it:

Click on this link, select “Rate this song” or “Become a Fan” or, better yet, both! Rating the song gives the artist a point, while becoming a fan gives the artist FIVE points!

Become a fan of the fore by clicking here! It won’t take but a minute … and you can listen to their music while you’re voting for them!

NOW … TO OTHER THINGS

Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band have added some new dates to their Working on a Dream tour, which starts late next month with three shows at the Comcast Theater in Hartford, Conn.

Now, in addition to other U.S. dates already set, they’re adding performances in Nashville, Tenn.
Tampa, Fla.
Sunrise, Fla.
Greenville, S.C.
Chicago. Ill.
Philadelphia, Pa.
St. Louis, Mo.
Kansas City, Mo.
Washington, D.C.
Charlotte, N.C.
New York, N.Y.
Cleveland, Ohio
Auburn Hills, Mich.
Milwaukee, Wisc.

So, if you’re around any of these areas, be sure to take in “The Boss” … ’cause you’re guaranteed an excellent show you won’t soon forget …

Seems I … er, forgot … something over the past few posts!

Remember, a few weeks ago, when Mollie Sugden (the wonderful Mrs. Slocombe on the Thames TV hit Are You Being Served?) died? I wuz putting up the installments of Mrs. Slocombe’s Erotic Dreams up here … and got a bit bogged down, thus forgetting Part 3!

Sooooooo, to make up for that, whaddya say we run all three installments on here, okay??
Here ya go (and my apologies for the delay. Enjoy!):

Now … still friends? Good. Then I’ll see ya on the flip side …

Bruth-uhs an’ Sisss-tuhhhs, they’s POWWWW-uhhhh in th’ MEWWWW-zikkk!! Howl-lay-loo-yuh!! (ahem … okay, so much for my preacher impersonation. Now ya see why I’m a writer …)

Hey … it’s true! Sixties rock — especially that which hit our shores from the “British Invasion” — carried with it an amazing ability to heal! (hmph … wish my dog would learn tha … oh. That’s “heel”, right? Sorry.)

Y’see, many of the early hits had a definitive rhythmic “bounce” to them. They were danceable, to be sure … but also easy to keep time with. This, according to psychologists, helped improve physical biorhythm. And the harmony helped add substance to the song, thus their listenability.
It caught the listener’s concentrated attention as well (for example, one of the reasons the Vanity Fare hit, Hitchin’ A Ride, was so popular is that kids were listening for the one note that was offkey at the end of each verse of the chorus).

Largely, harmony can evoke intense feelings, depending upon the song: romance, sadness, happiness and courage. But the hook of the song is what would get the song into the subconscious, where the listener would hear it over and over. (In fact, Over and Over is also an example! But the greatest of the time, obviously, was the Beatles’ She Loves You.)
And, if the song is something that’s lively, happy and is embedded there, then it can help fans out of any “blues” they feel.

Now … going to the instrumental side for a moment: Early bands were sometimes inspired by the lower-four-string style of American guitarist Duane Eddy. The deeper sounds are often considered physically therapeutic as well as emotionally.

KEEPING IT CLEAN

With recent medical news broadcasts stressing the importance of colon health, much of America is beginning to see that its cleansing provides some great long-term results as well as ward off the fear of cancer in that region.
The only problem we face, in fact, is finding the best cleanser to use. Many stores (from department to pharmacies) will carry different items and brands, and we can easily become confused as to their effectiveness.
But there’s one spot on the web that’ll review the best colon cleansers on the market today, and all so you’ll feel more at-ease when choosing one! They research cleansing power, ingredients, benefits, value, customer reviews and more. In fact, they even give you a “heads-up” about the “free-trial” scams that end up doing more harm than good.
So, for the peace-of-mind you deserve, click on that link you just passed and compare the top colon-cleansing products — then you can choose and use the best with confidence!

Now … that’s all the time we have for this post,  but check back in about 24 or so for more on the “Healing Power of ClassicRock” and other tidbits. Until then, remember: Keep your eyes on the skies, your feet on the ground, your heart with the music …

and I’ll see ya on the flip side!

Okay … maybe Phil Collins isn’t gonna perform or record anymore, but …

WHAT?? You mean you haven’t heard??

Well, apparently, Phil wants to spend more time with his other projects and, above all, his family. And, personally, it’s a very wise choice.

But that’s not gonna keep Genesis out of the mix! You see, they’ve packaged together all (yes, all!) their live albums and will release them as a boxed set on September 14th.

The box-set (which will include some interesting extras) is called Genesis Live 1973-2007 and includes their albums Genesis Live, Seconds Out, Three Sides Live and The Way We Walk.
You’ll also find Live At The Rainbow 1973 which is only available with the set.

You’ll also have bonus tracks not included on the original releases — and it’ll all be available in 5.1 surround sound for the first time!

IS THIS IT FOR REZNOR??

Word is that, since their NINJA tour wasn’t as stong as they expected, Nine Inch Nails will have its “final” final tour beginning in August.

These will all be smaller venues, but, as many acts will verify, the intimacy of smaller venues (and the fact that they all started with them) makes for a great tour!

Anyway, here are the dates:

Aug. 22 - Bowery Ballroom, New York
Aug 23 - Webster Hall, New York
Aug. 25-26 - Terminal 5, New York
Aug. 28-29 - Aragorn Ballroom, Chicago
Sept. 2 - Hollywood Palladium, Los Angeles
Sept. 3 - Henry Fonda Theater, Los Angeles
Sept. 5 - Wiltern Theater, Los Angeles
Sept. 6 - Echoplex, Los Angeles

WASHING UP

A few days ago, my kitchen faucet broke, and I found myself making a wild run to find a new one.
Now, I refuse to use anything but Delta faucets, but (as some of you probably have found) the local stores seem to have a very limited selection!

But there’s one place that offers you a tremendous selection of the most beautiful, practical, and durable Deltas on the market! Not only that, but they offer many extras like a Home Savers Club, great moneysaving plans like BillMeLater … and free shipping (see their site for more details on these) and much more!

So for the very best in Delta fauctes just click that link. The best brand … the best selection … the best service, all at the click of the mouse!

It’s official!  Sir Paul McCartney will be returning to the Ed Sullivan Theater this Wednesday to guest on The Late Show with David Letterman!

Now, all I can tell you is that he’ll be doing the usual interview then a performance — presumably a cut from his new-ish album, Electric Arguments.

But don’t put it past Macca to run through one of the Fab Four hits, or maybe even one from his Wings days.

The interview occurs just two days before his month-long “mini-tour” begins (three sold-out shows in NY’s Citi Field, then on to Landover, Md., Boston, Mass., Atlanta, Ga., Tulsa, Okla and Arlington, Texas.

Incidentally, Paul was not mad at Michael Jackson for outbidding him on The Beatles’ musical catalogue.  Here’s his views on it:

“Some time ago, the media came up with the idea that Michael Jackson was going to leave his share in the Beatles songs to me in his will which was completely made up and something I didn’t believe for a second.
Now the report is that I am devastated to find that he didn’t leave the songs to me. This is completely untrue.”

So now you know!! And I wouldn’t be surprised if Macca were to touch on Jackson’s recent death during the Letterman interview.   Nonetheless, this will definitely be “must-watch TV” for millions of Sir Paul’s fans (and, with school still out, it’ll be a great way to introduce your youngster to one of the living legends of rock!).

THESE SHOES WERE MEANT FOR WALKIN’

As a man who loves to walk (I put in seven to ten miles a day!), I can tell you that you need some really sturdy, comfortable footwear when you’re out there on the pavement or trail.
Now, if you’re tired of looking through mounds of shoes at a local department stores, just to find them ill-fitting or too high-priced, here’s a fantastic way of finding just the right pair for you — and at prices you’ll smile about!
When you click on the link I’m about to give you, you’ll find a store that specializes in creating the finest and most attractive footwear to work with the natural form of your foot!
You can choose from selections for both men and women (and also accessories!), and even customize your search results with their special drop-down menu!
But that’s not all! If your order comes to over $59.98 (still a great deal!), your order is shipped free!
So, for the best in Naot shoes (where nature meets nuturing), just click on that link now!
Your feet are really gonna thank you for it!

Hey … remember a few days back, when Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee (D-Tex., and no relation that I know of) introed a House Resolution in Congress to honor Michael Jackson?
At the memorial service, she showed the plaque and received a resounding standing ovation for her effort.

Well, according to House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, it ain’t gonna happen.

The wide-eyed wonder of the House said that debate on the symbolic measure could raise “contrary views” about the pop star’s life.

Lawmakers are free to use House speeches “to express their sympathy or their praise any time that they wish,” she said. “I don’t think it’s necessary for us to have a resolution. A resolution, I think, would open up to contrary views … that are not necessary at this time to be expressed in association with a resolution whose purpose is quite different.”

Of course, you’ve got racist jerks like “Rep.” Peter King (Representative?? of what?? Of who?? Whatever he “represents”, I don’t wanna part of it …) who says he’ll “fight” the measure (Yoooo-hoooo … Mr. Rep. Kinnnnnnnnk? Didja happen, like, to read it’s, ummm, not gonna be presented?? Or aren’t ya listeninno,Ithoughtnot …)

Fortunately, Rep. Lee is going to try and re-introduce it again soon (sheesh! Come on, guys and gals … it’s not a law we’re talkin’ about here!! What’s the problem??).

Let’s hope she succeeds this time (reckon we oughtta write/call/see our own Congresspeople and push for it?? Whaddya think, yardbirds??).

Every so often, I get a chance to do some voiceovers or mixing (these are gigs I had prior to bein’ a writer. [Sigh! Anything to keep others from seein' my face, huh?])

Now, as you probably know, there’s a lot of recording software traveling down the info superhighway … and many of ‘em are pretty good.
But … what if you could get an app that’d give you the professional results you want — and was free?

I most recently used Audacity 1.2.6 to record some promos for The Fore radio interview, and the result is outstanding!

Not only does it have everything you need to record/mix/fade your music or voice, but you also have fantastic effects, speed change without losing tempo, envelopes and much more! You can also save your final production as .wav file or export it as an .mp3!

Hey … why not test-drive it now, and send me a shout-out to tell me whatcha think?

AN AMAZING TALENT …

Yardbirds, after watching Michael Jackson’s memorial service (a very respectful tribute! Who could watch [especially] the last of it [when his daughter, Paris, gave her tribute] and not cry?), I have to say I’m really amazed by young Shaheen Jafargholi.
This 12-year-old from the UK has an amazing set of vocal cords … and a heart that’s just as golden! Not only did he perform Who’s Loving You? to soulful perfection, but his devotion to MJ and sadness over his passing was obviously evident.
There’s a great future ahead for this youngster, should he decide to pursue a full-fledged singing career! And his appearance at the memorial only made it the more special, because you saw, first-hand, the effect that “The Gloved One” had on a new generation.

Hey … remember an album by the famed rock ensemble, KISS, called Rock And Roll Over?
Well, now the band have their very own Rock And Roll Odor – and you can get it for just £4.99!

Yep … they’ve gone into the fragrance business by marketing two new scents, titled KISS Him and KISS Her (hey … their name fits the product, so why not?).

You can buy it online here in the states (could cost ya up to about thirty-five bucks), but the best price so far is at The Perfume Shop, which has over 170 stores across the UK and the Republic of Ireland.
In England, each fragrance is normally £26, but the Shop has cut the price to just £4.99! That means you can buy both fragrances for under ten pounds (minus the VAT, natch!).

The KISS Him Cologne Spray (pictured) is, according to its promo, “spicy-warm, oriental, distinctive, boldly masculine and lasting”. And get this — it’s packaged in a shiny black patent leather box, embossed with KISS graphics and the KISS logo in flames (guess it means “heat” and “passion”).

The KISS Her Eau De Toilette Spray (who comes up with these fancy names, anyway?) is said to be “succulent, wild… it entices and seduces like a high-energy, forbidden aphrodisiac”. (oookayyy … but ya don’t drink it, right??)

Y’know, it kinda makes ya wonder what these guys are gonna do next! Already, they’ve got hit records, comics, all kinds of merchandise, and Gene’s got a reality show and now his own record company. Of course, there’s also their live shows, which, IMHO, are yet to be beaten!

Pretty good for some boys from New York who just wanted to start a band years ago …