Music Bender

Seems I … er, forgot … something over the past few posts!

Remember, a few weeks ago, when Mollie Sugden (the wonderful Mrs. Slocombe on the Thames TV hit Are You Being Served?) died? I wuz putting up the installments of Mrs. Slocombe’s Erotic Dreams up here … and got a bit bogged down, thus forgetting Part 3!

Sooooooo, to make up for that, whaddya say we run all three installments on here, okay??
Here ya go (and my apologies for the delay. Enjoy!):

Now … still friends? Good. Then I’ll see ya on the flip side …

It’s official!  Sir Paul McCartney will be returning to the Ed Sullivan Theater this Wednesday to guest on The Late Show with David Letterman!

Now, all I can tell you is that he’ll be doing the usual interview then a performance — presumably a cut from his new-ish album, Electric Arguments.

But don’t put it past Macca to run through one of the Fab Four hits, or maybe even one from his Wings days.

The interview occurs just two days before his month-long “mini-tour” begins (three sold-out shows in NY’s Citi Field, then on to Landover, Md., Boston, Mass., Atlanta, Ga., Tulsa, Okla and Arlington, Texas.

Incidentally, Paul was not mad at Michael Jackson for outbidding him on The Beatles’ musical catalogue.  Here’s his views on it:

“Some time ago, the media came up with the idea that Michael Jackson was going to leave his share in the Beatles songs to me in his will which was completely made up and something I didn’t believe for a second.
Now the report is that I am devastated to find that he didn’t leave the songs to me. This is completely untrue.”

So now you know!! And I wouldn’t be surprised if Macca were to touch on Jackson’s recent death during the Letterman interview.   Nonetheless, this will definitely be “must-watch TV” for millions of Sir Paul’s fans (and, with school still out, it’ll be a great way to introduce your youngster to one of the living legends of rock!).

THESE SHOES WERE MEANT FOR WALKIN’

As a man who loves to walk (I put in seven to ten miles a day!), I can tell you that you need some really sturdy, comfortable footwear when you’re out there on the pavement or trail.
Now, if you’re tired of looking through mounds of shoes at a local department stores, just to find them ill-fitting or too high-priced, here’s a fantastic way of finding just the right pair for you — and at prices you’ll smile about!
When you click on the link I’m about to give you, you’ll find a store that specializes in creating the finest and most attractive footwear to work with the natural form of your foot!
You can choose from selections for both men and women (and also accessories!), and even customize your search results with their special drop-down menu!
But that’s not all! If your order comes to over $59.98 (still a great deal!), your order is shipped free!
So, for the best in Naot shoes (where nature meets nuturing), just click on that link now!
Your feet are really gonna thank you for it!

Hey … better late than never, right??

For you tennis fans who dig the Wimbledon scene, you’ve still got one more day to visit Starcards.org and bid on the only WTA Tour No.1 Jersey signed by nine former “World Number Ones! Those who signed the jersey include Kim Clijsters, Amelie Mauresmo, Venus Williams, Serena Williams, Martina Hingis, Martina Navratilova, Justine Henin, Tracy Austin and Maria Sharapova.

You can also bid on Serena Williams’ signed designer Nike shoes, and thirty other items. This auction runs until tomorrow … so go for it!

MRS. SLOCOMBE/MOLLIE SUGDEN

Man, I had no idea how popular this wonderful lady — who died last week at the age of 86 — really was until I received a number of emails on my Facebook entry about her!
Now, in the last post (and as a tribute to her), I gave ya Part I of The Erotic Dreams of Mrs. Slocombe.
Doesn’t seem right to have it stop there, does it? So … here’s Pt. II:

Part 3 follows later this evenin’ (should be on yer monitor doorstep while you’re fixin’ yer morning coffee!) … so, I’ll see ya then!

She was one of the most recognizable faces on television — and “I am unanimous in that.”

Mollie Sugden, who played Mrs. Slocombe on the famous UK comedy series, Are You Being Served?, passed away yesterday at the age of 86.
This comes just a little over four months after her co-star, Wendy Richards (Miss Brahms), died of cancer.

Frank Thornton, who played Captain Peacock in the comedy, told the BBC: ‘Mollie, of course, was an excellent comedian.
If you can play comedy, you can play anything - you can play tragedy as well. And if you can only play tragedy, you can’t play comedy. She was a jolly good actress.’

Mrs. Sugden had been ill for some time, and, to some, she lost a lot of her will to recover when her husband, William Moore, died in 2000.

In honor of and tribute to this wonderful lady with such a tremendous sense of humor, here’s Part I of The Erotic Dreams of Mrs. Slocombe:

Part II comes up tomorrow … ’til then …
see ya on the flip side!

Some things are expected on television: A murder on the CSI shows, that friggin’ “Viagra” commercial, Stephen Colbert’s shock of black hair.

Wellll … almost expected …

The comedian, who’s a master of satire and improvised banter on Comedy Central’s “Colbert Report,” started his USO tour (aptly named “Operation Iraqi Stephen: Going Commando”) Sunday in Baghdad — headquarters of the U.S.-led military coalition in Iraq.

“It must be nice in Iraq, because some of you keep coming back again and again,” Colbert joked, referring to the multiple tour that many troops have had in Iraq since the 2003 invasion. Some troops had accumulated enough frequent flyer miles to earn them a free ticket to Afghanistan, he continued.

Colbert told his guest, Gen. Ray Odierno, he felt “a little intimidated” by him because it felt like he was “interviewing Shrek.” Odierno is a huge bald figure at 6′ 5″.

When Stephen said, “I, Stephen Colbert, by the power invested in me by basic cable, officially declare we won the Iraq war,” his audience broke out into applause.

But, then, the interview was interrupted, and President Obama appeared on large television screens. The commander-in-chief told his Gen. Odierno it was time to “cut that man’s hair.”

With white electric hair clippers in his hand, Ordierno stood up and began shaving Colbert’s trademark thick dark hair. The troops stood and cheered as a female member of Colbert’s staff finished the job.

After the haircut, Colbert ran through the audience, high-fiving the troops as he showed off his new military look.

Speaking of “look”: Look for the episode to appear on Monday night’s edition of Colbert Report. The producers rushed to get the taping prepped for airing and, apparently, did a fantastic job of it!

TO BE A-DOORED

Y’know, it’s obvious: a really great-looking door adds a lot of class to your home, no matter how big or small it is.  Whether inside or out, it should not only provide a beauty that complements your home, but also security against the elements (wind, rain, etc.) as well as intruders!

Now, we can drive for hours (and spend more than we wanted) to try and find just the right door for our homes (and businesses), but come  up with one that either doesn’t fit right or just isn’t the style we really want. 

Fortunately, there’s a great solution to all this, and it’s found just by clicking the link I’m about to give you!
Not only will you find the best deals on custom-made doors anywhere, but you’ll find them made to your specifications with the finest quality material and care!
All you have to do to find the best Naples Fl
custom doors is to click that link you just passed. Remember … the whole process begins with your ideas!

The Guns ‘n Roses offshoot, Velvet Revolver, is looking for a new front man — and they just may find him in the form of an American Idol contestant!

Their versatile guitarist Slash appeared on the show recentlly to coach contestants for “rock week” – and, apparently, one singer stood out above the rest.

According to columnist Joe Bosso at the scene:
“All performed admirably but nobody seemed to truly hit it out of the ballpark until Adam Lambert came on and lit into an I’m-going-for-it version of the Led Zeppelin classic Whole Lotta Love.“
“Wonder if Slash asked Lambert to come on down for a Velvet Revolver audition? If he didn’t, perhaps Jimmy Page might want to give him a ring. Stranger things have happened.”

It’s interesting to note that, of all the applicants for the VR position, Shooter Jennings — son of late country legend Waylon Jennings and a recording artist in his own right — was seriously considered for the job.
But, since it appears American Idol is the testing ground for a few of today’s stars, it’s very possible that the next Revolver frontman will come from their ranks.
Anything to get away from Simon Cowell, eh??

See ya on the flip side …

There’s no doubt that one of the hottest bands on the planet right now is the Irish ensemble of U2.
And front man Bono (Paul Hewson) is responsible for many of the great songs they’ve released over the years.

But one that hasn’t gotten beyond the “poem” stage has been his homage to American rock icon Elvis Presley.
Recently, he uncovered his 1995 work for the BBC’s Des Shaw. And, while he professes a tremendous appreciation for the “King of Rock,” his verses are … well, rather unique.

For example, he writes:

“elvis with God on his knees, elvis on three tvs,
elvis here come the killer bees, head full of honey, potato chips and cheese,
elvis the bumper stickers, elvis the white knickers,
elvis the white n***** ate at burger king and just kept getting bigger,
elvis sang to win, elvis the battle to be slim,
elvis ate america before america ate him.”

The poem, which will be broadcast on BBC Radio 4 during an Elvis tribute program a week from today (on May 13), will have a warning about its language.

More of the poem:

“elvis the charismatic, elvis the ecstatic,
elvis the plastic, elvis the elastic with a spastic dance
that might explain the energy of america.”

Now, when you re-read this poem (which is gonna be highly controversial), you’ll find it almost a bio of Presley over the last years of his life. Whether it’ll be put to music or not, the Beeb has already considered it a masterpiece!
But, then again, Bono and his band has already been considered one of the BBC’s “pampered pets”.

Until tomorrow night, same time … see ya on the flip side!

Before we begin, lemme remind ya that The Fore are up for the #1 position on the Unsigned Charts Radio with their song, Little Louisa. But they can’t get there without your help in the voting process.
So if you’ll click on this link, then include the name of the song (Little Louisa), the band (The Fore) and then, unless you’re a member, your e-mail address in the space provided, and finish it off by clicking the “send” button, the band will be back at #1 in no time flat!
And, on behalf of the lads (as well as myself) … thanks!

THE DEAD HAVE NO CD …

At least that’s what the note said that David Letterman’s stage manager handed him prior to The Dead’s appearance!

They came on last (musical acts normally wrap up the evening’s show) and sounded, for all the world, every bit as good as they did when Garcia was with them!
Throughout the performance, you couldn’t help noticing that everyone’s eyes were on Bob Weir and singer Warren Haynes. Perhaps it was because, for some time, these two were at each other’s throats, figuratively speaking.

IT TOOK ONE MAN TO CHANGE IT …

When the band was invited by President Obama to meet with him in the Oval Office (yes, that Oval Office!) before their April 13 Washington gig, they were said to have been in awe of the President’s “CCC” nature (cool, calm and collected) as well as his neatness.
But perhaps what really got to them was the fact that, outside the Office, Barack had some Scarlet Begonias set in a vase. Of course, that was a tear-jerker that was one of Jerry Garcia’s most famous songs.
Another was that they’d finally seen the fruition of their (and millions of others’) work; the man who actually influenced them to come together on his behalf during the campaign was not only in the White House; he’s an actual fan of the band!

And, as you and I both know, it’s always good to “have a friend in high places,” right??

Okay … I’m gonna get away from this keyboard for a few hours, but stay tuned … there’s gonna be more in less than 24!

So I’ll see ya on the flip side!

No, it wasn’t a misprint.

Y’see, former rock/blues/jazz superstar Van Morrison is being called that by a number of singer/songwriters on both sides of the pond.
Although he’s been in the business for almost fifty years now (he was first noticed here in the states as front man for the Irish band, Them, and their hit song Gloria), Van Morrison has done everything from refuse contact with his fans to dissing the entire world of rock, both yesterday’s and today’s.

On Sunday night, he appeared on Austin City Limits and, quite frankly, I was disappointed in his music! Seems his gutsy, blues-tinged voice has been replaced by a lot of slurred lyrics and occasional grunts.

At the end of the show — while the credits are rolling — ACL normally has their musical guests doing some interview time — it’s there to show the human, offstage side of the performers.

Not with Morrison, though. As I understand it, he refused to be part of it. Somehow, one gets the feeling that he’s above all that (at least, in his own mind).

What’s your take on the man? Have I missed something here? I mean, he does have some fabulous songs in his library, and there’s no question that he can still belt them out, but … why shut out the fans that made him?
That, in any entertainment field, is dangerous!

AC/DC NOT APPEARING BECAUSE …

they never said they would! Actually, the legendary hard-rockers have accused Romanian promoters of “falsely advertising” them as headlining the Bucharest Rock Arena festival, which runs on 30-31 May. Now, this must’ve been a pretty convincing scam, because you could buy tickets online as well as at different retail outlets in the country’s capital.

Unfortunately, this isn’t the only time it’s happened to a band. Y’see, the fact is that, somewhere along the gig route, someone “representing xxx band” is gonna contact a promoter and strike a deal for that “band” to appear.
Then, once a partial is paid to this “rep”, he/she takes off for the vast unknown, leaving the promoter with “egg on his/her face” when the real band doesn’t show.
By showtime, the fake “reps” will be long gone … and it takes a ton of paperwork as well as some crafty detective work to find them. Sadly, all too often, the courts give ‘em a “slap-on-the-wrist” when they’re found.

IS THE BEEBS REALLY PRO BONO?

Seems that the BBC (British Broadcasting Corporation) is under fire again, thanks to their allegiance to the Irish rock band, U2.

Not only have they given over a million pounds’ worth of free publicity to the band (whose latest album, No Line On The Horizon, entered the charts at #1) and apparently beginning to edit on-air remarks that question the band’s sincerity.
Apparently, Bono and the boys have moved their company to The Netherlands, thus giving them a big tax break … even while they’re pushing the Irish government to increase its aid budget!

Now, the BBC did pretty much the same thing, publicity-wise, for The Beatles, and there wasn’t much flak at the time. As far as editing goes: The Beebs seems to have forgotten a cardinal rule that governs today’s shows: If it’s not obscene and doesn’t promote hatred or racial prejudice, run with it; it could be a ratings boost!

QUICK UPDATE: Check out my new website at Doc Rock Online for news, views and more!

Okay … that’s it for this go’round. Until tomorrow, remember: Keep your eyes on the skies, your feet on the ground, your heart with the music … and I’ll see ya on the flip side!

Hey … remember when I toldja that J. D. Fortune had been fired from rockers INXS for (among other things) his cocaine use?

Well, the band denies it.  When he said that INXS had dropped him from the band and left him broke and homeless, INXS’s former manager and new label boss Chris Murphy set the record straight.

The Aussie rockers were going on a short break from touring, before planning to reconvene to write and record a new album with Fortune. Now it looks like JD’s TV meltdown (where he claimed he had been sacked from the band) has cost him that opportunity.

Speaking to the UK’s Daily Telegraph, Murphy said: “Not only are we shocked by the claims, even the place the supposed incident was to have taken place is a mystery to the band. The band has a new recording deal with my label and Fortune was about to be called. I guess I have no reason to call him now.”

Fortune, the replacement for the late Michael Hutchence, was the winner of a talent show contest to find a new INXS singer.  Unfortunately, he’s learned (or we hope he’s learned) one very important lesson.  Never bite the hand that feeds ya!
If he’d told the truth to start, rather than trying to garner the public’s sympathy, he wouldn’t have to worry about “being homeless” or whatever.  And, dude, if you’re really on cocaine, then put the blame for your situation where it belongs!  ‘Nuff said … let’s go on:

ALLMANS TO WEBCAST ANNIV. SHOW

The live performance will be web-casting the Allman Brothers Band’s 40th anniversary 15-date concert series. The concert is live from the Beacon Theatre in New York City and starts Monday, March 9, 2009.
Each three-hour concert has celebrity musicians in tribute to Duane Allman, the band’s original leader, who passed away in 1971.

The band is using Onstream’s pay-per-view commerce capabilities to charge a fee for individuals to view all 15 concerts live. The events will also be archived for subsequent playback and subscribers can replay any of the concerts for 6 months following the live event.

Tthe entire 15 show series at the Beacon Theatre is sold out. The on-line webcast is now the only way for Allman Brothers fans to experience the entire concert series.

Okay … that’s all for now, but stay tuned ’cause we’ll have more goodies in less than 24!  Until then …

see ya on the flip side!

Got RelicMail from a reader in Toronto who wantsta know what TV programs are the equivalent of rock music.
Dude, I don’t wanna open a canadaworms here, but this que is gonna have more answers than Yesterday has covers! See, each one of us has our faves … but the Relic’s gonna clue ya in to the famous Rockaholic (TV) Diet: (btw, I weigh-in at a svelte 160, so it’s bound to work! )

Whose Line Is It, Anyway? has gotta top the list in comedy! The improv impishness of Drew Carey, Ryan Stiles, Colin Mochrie, Wayne Brady and guest comedians is total TV rock at its finest! You’ve got the liveliness, the spontaneity, a sometimes-irreverent attitude, creativity and delivery that every rocker knows is a “must-have”. Gotta see it on ABC Family channel (on varying weeknights, 10 PM EST). Or you can check it out on DVD at yer local vid store.

Craig Ferguson of the Late Show with … is definitely a shoo-in for most rockin’ talker! This dude is already one of us, ’cause he was drummer for Bastards from Hell (not to be confused with the former administration).

He’s witty, boyishly charming, animated and, just as the guys in Whose Line?, can be a bit irreverent. Now, he also has a lively way of Q&Aing his guests … and brings in some really decent acts from all genres to perform! Definitely a watcher, he’s on right after Letterman, for you insomniacs …

House has gotta top the charts as the coolest drama, thanx to the acting chops of star Hugh Laurie. I’ve been a fan of this dude since his old Fry and Laurie in Jolly Olde, but he’s been on-screen on both sides of the drink on many occasions! Again, we press the irreverent button, couplin’ it with wit, sarcasm … and a fickle finger to the hierarchy!
Outside his House, Laurie also is an excellent jazz pianist, runnin’ with his group, Band from TV (which, btw, had the top-selling album on Amazon recently.  It’s called Hoggin’ All The Covers, and is fantabulous!). Oh … didja know that, when he auditioned for House, he actually apologized for the way he looked? He thought it was for a bit part!
The show’s on Tuesday nights, 9 PM EST, on FOX.

Scrubs. Think Monkees, but without the music vids (well, sometimes …) and laughtrack, and you’ve got the concept. Now, they do hit on some “serious” for a few frames, but, even with that, it’s the liveliest, funniest and hippest hospital on the tube! (Oh … izzit just me, or does Zach Braff look like Ray Romano’s younger brother? And Sarah Chalke’s done an excellent job of de-Becky-fying herself from Roseanne!)

QUIZTIME!! (in other words, back to the ROCK!!) Back in 1968, Tommy James and the Shondells hit platinum with the powerhouse beat of Mony, Mony (covered, years later, by Billy Idol). Without lookin’ at yer notes (er, a website), class, can ya tell me where that name came from?
HEYYYY … a TWOoo-fer!! Where did the group, Steely Dan, get its name (hint: It ain’t ’cause they were from Indiana’s steel territory of Gary, either!)? And, for extra credit: Walter Becker and Donald Fagen were in an earlier band whose drummer became a successful comic. Who was he? (hint: He’s him, and you’re not!)

Well, that’s it for this go-’round, rockaholics! Until next time, remember:
Keep your eyes on the skies, your feet on the ground, your heart with the music … and I’ll see ya on the flip side ..